Today is a new beginning!! And I love it!! Time to take the "bull by the horns" and go after this life. I've been so blessed to have a healthy body, fabulous children and a husband who loves, adores and supports me. What more can I say?!
I have to admit, for some time now I have allowed myself to think that my "prime" is over. I have told myself that my contribution in life is somewhat over. I also admit that there have been times I allowed my identity to be placed on the physical. I felt I missed so much in the hearing world, that if I showed by example physical attributes and honorable actions then I would be worthy of influence, than that was the way I was going to go. I allowed myself to think that I didn't have a voice simply because I didn't hear. Crazy.
Now does that mean I didn't express myself from time to time? Of course not. I have had my moments to declare what I believe to be true. Unfortunately though, I often felt, especially within my family circles, that what I said did not carry weight or that it was unimportant. I also felt that I would try and say something in a rush of words, hoping to be heard or validated, maybe, and then find that I felt myself second guessing what I said. And of course, feeling like I rambled on to "deaf ears", no pun intended. Oh the communication process can be exhausting, pitiful and even made too complicated. Why can't it be more simple? Right.
However, in all this, I'm grateful for my voice. I often think and have said, "I want to be remembered by others to be a woman of integrity. A woman committed to her husband and children. I want to be remembered as knowing that I have a loving Father in Heaven, who despite my weaknesses and short-comings, still has confidence in my ability to love, to influence for a greater good, to be a woman in the world but not of it."
And that is just the beginning...
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